Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Marriage, Divorce, and Getting Knocked Up

Just as October 17th is my most Unlucky Day of the Year, October 25 is my Luckiest Day. Yes, folks, today is my Lucky Day.

Why, you ask? Read on.

First of all, today is my Wedding Anniversary. Three fantastic years of being married to Blaker. Happy Wedding Anniversary to Me (and Blaker).

But lots of people have wedding anniversaries, so why is mine my lucky day? Well, it is also my Divorce Anniversary. That's right. Without realizing it (at least, without realizing it consciously) Blaker and I set our wedding date for the same date as the anniversary of my divorce from my first husband. Which would have been a day of celebration anyway, but this just makes it even more so.

Interesting, huh? But wait, there's more.

October 25th is also the day that we conceived Bellamy. Yes, while celebrating my divorce, we managed to create a new life. Yet another reason to love October 25th. (My Mom says I must really know how to celebrate.)

So there you have it--the reasons why I love today. Now, excuse me, but I have to go celebrate. Thank God my tubes are tied. :)

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

If I'm Gonna Die, It'll Be Today

Today is October 17th. October 17th is MY UNLUCKY DAY. My entire life, at least as far back as I can remember, October 17th has brought only unpleasantness (often long term) into my happy little world.

Examples:

10/17/88-- I was diagnosed with Diabetes
10/17/90--I got braces
10/17/94--I broke my wrist
10/17/98--car accident

You get the idea.

Around 1999, I started just not even bothering to get out of bed on the 17th. I figured it was just safer if I stayed as close to home as possible. But then once the kids came along, that plan went all to hell. Kids sort of make staying in bed all day an impossibility.

So what have I done today? Thus far, not much. Took Bellamy to preschool, splurged on a giant, extremely fattening bagel for breakfast, ran errands, took Jenn to the airport...oh, and I am currently having Sam Adams Oktoberfest for lunch, but who can really blame me. It could, after all, be my LAST DRINK. Because if I'm gonna kick the bucket, it'll be on Oct. 17th. Maybe not this year, but someday.

If you hear from me tomorrow, you'll know I'm gonna last another year. Hmmm...I think it's time for more beer.

Wednesday, October 4, 2006

I like your hot black shoes and your sexy butt

Last Friday night, Blaker and I got to do something that is precious and rare in our household--have a night without the munchkins. My Mom was up visiting to babysit, we had reservations for a super-fancy restaurant, concert tickets, hotel reservations downtown, the works. It was going to be a night to remember.

As I was slipping on my best CFM shoes--black, sexy, with extremely high heels--Bellamy wandered into the room. "Hey, Mommy, what are you doing?" I explained that Daddy and I were going to have a grown-up night and I was getting dressed so that we could get going in time to make our dinner reservation. She sat for a minute and watched as I put on my lipstick and jewelry. Then she said just what I've always longed to hear from my three-year old daughter. "I like your hot black shoes and your sexy butt."

Yes, you heard me. I LIKE YOUR HOT BLACK SHOES AND YOUR SEXY BUTT.

What happened to the days of "Mommy, you look pretty," and "Mommy, you need a hairbow like me"? The child DOES spend an eerie amount of time perusing my latest edition of InStyle each month, but she can't actually read it, so how damaging can it be? She doesn't watch television, and her movie experience is limited to Little Einstein and Disney. Last time I checked, Prince Charming never said to Snow White, "Hey, Baby, I like your hot black shoes and your sexy butt." So she formulated this on her own. Yes, my shoes WERE hot, and my butt did look pretty damn good, if I do say so myself, but I'd still rather have received a more toned-down compliment from Little Miss.

Ah, well, The evening DID go fantastically, and now I have yet another crazy memory of my crazy girl.